security company....
"Try a free home consultation by our highly recommended team of
experienced ex-burglers"
So much better than trying to inflict 'fear into buying their products...

Ps: Saw another advert for loads of rehomed donkeys happily
running across the green and pleasant land that is this 'sceptered Isle.
Shurly, UK donkeys don't go around carrying 1/2 ton of house bricks ?
Pss: If I was a donkey, I'd love to run around fields getting fed by daft people for doing nothing all day...
'Good job I'm not a donkey..