Getting old can be funny.

A light-hearted section of Jokes - Text Games - Only In Egypt Photos and Videos - Brainteasers and General Fun Stuff to while away the spare minutes of your day.

Moderators: DJKeefy, 4u Network

Post Reply
User avatar
WIZARD
Egyptian God
Egyptian God
Posts: 7947
Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2005 5:12 pm
Location: LUTON
Has thanked: 25 times
Been thanked: 226 times
Gender:
Contact:
United Kingdom

Getting old can be funny.

Post by WIZARD »

Getting old can be funny.

Elderly gentleman...
Had serious hearing problems for a number of years.. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%
The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your hearing is perfect.. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.'
The gentleman replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet.
I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!'

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?'
Slim says, 'I feel just like a newborn baby.'
'Really!? Like a newborn baby!?'
'Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.'

A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:
'So I hear you're getting married?'
'Yep!'
'Do I know her?'
'Nope!'
'This woman, is she good looking?'
'Not really.'
'Is she a good cook?'
'Naw, she can't cook too well.'
'Does she have lots of money?'
'Nope! Poor as a church mouse..'
'Well, then, is she good in bed?'
'I don't know.'
'Why in the world do you want to marry her then?'
'Because she can still drive!'

Three old guys are out walking.
First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?'
Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!'
Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer..'

A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art.. It's perfect.'
'Really,' answered the neighbor . 'What kind is it?'
'Twelve thirty..'

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'
Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.''
The doctor said, 'I didn't say that.. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'

And One more. . ..!
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'
'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'

:lol: :lol: :lol:


WIZARD
User avatar
Bullet Magnet
Royal V.I.P
Royal V.I.P
Posts: 2530
Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2009 10:38 am
Location: Le Manège Enchanté
Has thanked: 5362 times
Been thanked: 1475 times
Contact:

Re: Getting old can be funny.

Post by Bullet Magnet »

An old man goes to the Doctor's as he is not feeling well..
The Doctor examines him carefully, then the Doctor gives his verdict..

*you have ten left to live" Said the Doctor.

Worried, the old man says "Ten !! Ten What"

the Doctor then looks at his watch and replies..

"Nine" . . :cool:
There's a time for everyone, if they only learn
That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn.
Post Reply
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post
  • It's funny.
    by WIZARD » » in Literary Corner
    3 Replies
    1038 Views
    Last post by WIZARD
  • The funny side of Egypt (photos)
    by DJKeefy » » in Just 4 Fun
    5 Replies
    2389 Views
    Last post by Dusak