English from Around the World

A light-hearted section of Jokes - Text Games - Only In Egypt Photos and Videos - Brainteasers and General Fun Stuff to while away the spare minutes of your day.

Moderators: DJKeefy, 4u Network

User avatar
BENNU
Egyptian Pharaoh
Egyptian Pharaoh
Posts: 3227
Joined: Fri Mar 27, 2009 6:31 pm
Has thanked: 1010 times
Been thanked: 3478 times
Gender:
Egypt

English from Around the World

Post by BENNU »

Wonderful English from Around the World

In a Bangkok Temple:

IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Cocktail Lounge, Norway:

LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Doctor's Office, Rome:

SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Dry Cleaners, Bangkok:

DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

A Nairobi Restaurant:

CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE, OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi:

TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

On a poster at Kencom:

ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP.

In a City restaurant:

OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

In a Cemetery:

PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS, FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:

GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE, OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS, IN BED.

On the menu of a Swiss Restaurant:

OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a Tokyo Bar:

SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel, Yugoslavia:

THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE, IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel, Japan:

YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID .

In the lobby of a Moscow Hotel, across from a Russian Orthodox Monastery:

YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY, WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY, EXCEPT THURSDAY.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:

IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE, THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT, UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel, Zurich:

BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:

WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:

WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

A Laundry in Rome:

LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND THEN SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.

And finally, the all time classic, Seen in an Abu Dhabi Souk shop window:
IF THE FRONT IS CLOSED, PLEASE ENTER THROUGH MY BACKSIDE



LovelyLadyLux
Egyptian Pharaoh
Egyptian Pharaoh
Posts: 3252
Joined: Sun Nov 22, 2009 2:27 am
Has thanked: 985 times
Been thanked: 2256 times
Canada

Re: English from Around the World

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

Good ones!

newcastle
Egyptian God
Egyptian God
Posts: 7576
Joined: Thu Oct 17, 2013 11:49 am
Has thanked: 2120 times
Been thanked: 6342 times
Egypt

Re: English from Around the World

Post by newcastle »

Hilarious :lol:

User avatar
Winged Isis
Egyptian Pharaoh
Egyptian Pharaoh
Posts: 3867
Joined: Thu Jul 05, 2007 2:38 pm
Location: Australia
Has thanked: 1568 times
Been thanked: 1027 times
Gender:
Australia

Re: English from Around the World

Post by Winged Isis »

Wonderful!
Carpe diem! :le:

  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post
  • Ah but your English.
    by carrie » Thu Nov 16, 2017 3:48 pm » in Living in Luxor
    15 Replies
    220 Views
    Last post by Dusak
    Sat Nov 18, 2017 3:05 pm
  • Egyptian English
    by BENNU » Sun Mar 13, 2016 12:42 pm » in Living in Luxor
    7 Replies
    147 Views
    Last post by Major Thom
    Mon Mar 14, 2016 4:13 pm
  • English Language
    by LovelyLadyLux » Sun Oct 26, 2014 5:45 pm » in Just 4 Fun
    0 Replies
    1489 Views
    Last post by LovelyLadyLux
    Sun Oct 26, 2014 5:45 pm
  • The English Are Civilized - Others Are Not
    by Hafiz » Mon Nov 04, 2019 11:22 pm » in Know Egypt
    0 Replies
    225 Views
    Last post by Hafiz
    Mon Nov 04, 2019 11:22 pm
  • English Teaching or other work ?
    by Keithfazackerley » Mon Apr 04, 2016 11:07 am » in Living in Luxor
    18 Replies
    362 Views
    Last post by crewmeal
    Fri Apr 08, 2016 7:43 am